I, Peter Antony John Greenwood, am hereby running for president of the United States of America. Hell, if an absolute nutter like Kanye can do it then all bets are off at this point.
But what can I, a 34 year old Scotsman bring to the office of the most powerful country on earth? A lot more than the current president brings to you, that’s for damned sure.
So what do I stand for? If elected President of those United States, who broke away from the United Kingdom 244 years and 1 day ago today, what will I do for you, the people?
And I’ve had a think about who will represent and work for you, the people of these United States. I hereby present my choices for government.
So vote for me, Peter Greenwood, for President of the United States. Make America Great Britain Again!